n. & Treatment

[Originally posted in Rise Again].
I haven’t posted in Rise Again since August. I used to post the news about n. here, but in September 2004 I started to post the news about n. in my public blog, A Sea of Flowers. If n. stays addicted, he will probably not care about my having written about him. If he gets better, he may not want to be reminded about his story, but it won’t hurt him.
I am frustrated with n’s situation. He has been able to bend so many situations to his advantage, and he seems to keep avoiding the consequences of his actions. I have helped to guard him against some of them myself and I have been reading some of my old posts with dismay. I have seen the problem and I have seen how useless I have been at helping n., and how has manipulated me, again and again, but I keep trying to help, and I keep repeating my mistakes.
All the other players in the system keep putting the responsibility for getting n. into drug treatment on him. I keep hearing that no treatment program will have him until he is “ready” but I wonder if that isn’t an excuse to avoid having to work with him. No one seems to want to take hold of n. and work with him. I also keep hearing that the treatment resources for amphetamine addiction are simply not there. I would like to just get him off the street, get him away from the drug and get him working on his own recovery. I can’t do it because I can’t hold him or lock him up, and because he doesn’t keep his promises when he lives with me.


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