We have had a few days of sunshine and moderately warm temperatures, with deep blue skies, streaked with a few high wispy cirrus clouds. The geese are flying between waterlogged fields, rivers and creeks, retention ponds and assorted bodies of water. The leaves on many trees have turned colour and started to fall. It’s generally warm enough to ride in shorts and short-sleeved shirts or light shells although it gets cool as the sun goes down. It gets dark by 7:30 PM, and my friends and I have taken measures to get an early start for our rides during the work week.
Mike and I had good rides on Friday afternoon, Sunday morning, and yesterday (Tuesday) evening. On Friday we rode the familiar route to the Grace Hospital via Assiniboine Park and the Moray bridge. Yesterday we took the Harte trail to the Perimeter, dodging a few mud puddles on the trail, and driving through clouds of tiny midges and flies that appeared in the evening light. Sunday morning was a glorious ride across East Kildonan to Bird’s Hill, a cross Highway 59 and out into country east of Birds Hill, by gravel roads along the Floodway. He came back into the City in Transcona and across the City back to the Forks.
I am hoping for a several more weeks of clear warm weather, followed by a quick transition to winter with real snow for skiing. I can hope.
This side of the grass
My father had scheduled day surgery for a hernia this morning. It was a simple day surgery, but at 75, diabetic and with a history of cardiac issues, nothing is safe or sure. It went well. He had declined my offers to get him to the hospital over the last few weeks, but accepted at the last minute. My sister Teresa took the day off work to take care of our mother, who is not able to be alone due to advancing dementia.
I picked him up at 5:45 AM. It brought back memories of the years when I worked for him when he was a construction superintendent, and early mornings headed for the hunting grounds.
My father has a fear of hospitals and he dragged his feet on the way in, and almost danced out when his surgery was over. He said it was a very mild experience after his bypass surgery some years ago. He was joking and happy (I am not supposed to life anything heavier than 5 kilos – how am I supposed to take a leak?).
When he had his bypass surgery a few years ago, he announced that it was good to be on this side of the grass.
Active Life
I have set up a new archive category called “Active Life” which will hold posts about health and fitness, with posts about specific activities – cycling, cross-country skiing, hiking, camping, and hunting falling into their own sub-categories. I changed my cycling category “Two Wheels Good” to a subcategory under “Active Life”.
I am not sure where this is going. It’s a blog and it will be about what I do. It will not necessarily say much about technique and gear, but I may mention the infrastructure of fitness.
Fall Riding
At this time of the year, the light becomes dim by 8:00 and it’s dark by 8:15 PM. The leaves have started to turn colour and fall. It has been a rainy and cold summer. So far, we have managed to keep up our rides in the evening and we have not have to resort to our cycling tights and cold weather headgear, but the MEC shells have been useful. We started our rides at 6:30 PM during the summer, and we have rolled that back to 6:15 as the days have become shorter.
Prodigal Son
My chronicle of my feelings about n’s efforts to fight his boredom with drugs, gaming fantasies, heavy metal, anarchy, satanism and street life have been archived under the category heading of “Family & Life”. It has taken a life of its own and I have moved the posts to an archive sub-category called “Prodigal Son.”
The story of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15.11-32)is a parable – a story told to make a point – about forgiveness and acceptance and spirituality. The spiritual lesson can be read in different ways. One of them is that God forgives the repentent sinner. That is the way the story has been retold in the famous song “Amazing Grace.” Another is that I should constantly forgive and constantly hope that he will recover.
The parable does not necessarily present a good psychological model of trust and boundaries in parenting, although in fact there is a significant boundary observed in the story. The son had taken his inheritance and spent it enjoying dissolute living in a far country, and came to a moment when he wanted to go home. At Luke 15:17, the story goes “But when he came to himself …”. I am challenged to trust myself to see when my son has come to himself and to find the right way to support him when he does.
Entertained
“Entertained” is a new category in this web log. I am trying to archive posts about my entertainment interests into one category which will hold posts about what I read, listen to, or see for my entertainment, organized into sub-categories about specific interests like books, folk music, folk festivals, movies. I used to have separate categories for books, folk music and other entertainments, and those categories have survived within the new “top-level” category.
A Visit
I saw n. and met his friend Nigel when they came to my house unannounced early yesterday evening. N.’s duffel bag had appeared in my back yard when I came home from work. He rang the doorbell a short while later. N. didn’t introduce Nigel until I asked, near the end of the visit. N. has told me that Nigel is older than 18, but he is short and slight and looks younger. N. asked for money for food. I offered them the supplies to make sandwiches while they sat on the porch, and they accepted my offer. They spent some of their time with notepads writing songs and the storyline of a role-laying game that they were acting out.
Upgraded to MT 3.1
I have downloaded and installed the upgrade to the new release of Movable Type, version 3.1, which came out August 31. I had been running version 3.0D. I didn’t need or want the Developer edition but the tried and tested version 2.6n was no longer available when I moved my blogging from Typepad to my own hosted web site.
Homeless
After the second part of the discharge conference on Friday, I expected that n. would spend most of his time at the apartment on Balmoral Street, until that arrangement collapsed. When he had been in hospital, n. told me a story about Keith, the actual tenant, slicing a phone cord to make a point to a visitor who had outstayed his welcome.
His plans held up for two to three days.
Discharge Conference – Part 2
The discharge conference was continued on Friday morning August 27. N. was being discharged – he could not stay at the hospital even if he wanted to, and was not going have a continuing relationship with this doctor. Medical psychiatry is focussed on sedating and housing people who act out and fit within a few diagnostic categories. Adolescent anger, dangerous life choices, addiction, even personality disorder are not issues that psychiatry claims to fix. How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one if the bulb really wants to change. Psychiatrists don’t often acknowledge the limitations of their art, and when they run into an impossible situation, they can find lots of reasons why they can’t help. The dramatic trope that if only the patient had been diagnosed and treated sooner is familiar. The mental health professional tends to imply that she/he could have helped the child if the parents would have been different, or if other things in life had been different.
The resident who had been involved on Tuesday was there again. There was a second resident too. I think the conference was intended, from Dr. Perlov’s perspective, as a teaching conference for the residents. I went in understanding that he had encouraged Jan and me to tolerate some of n’s choices, to stay in touch and to support him emotionally. At the same time, he had been vague.
At his invitation I covered the events since Tuesday. N. got restless and Dr. Perlov interrupted me. He said I had a pedantic style and I was boring him. It was a power play. He had taken this conference to show that he had been involved in n’s care but it was becoming a waste of time for him. The good news for n. – he does not get identified as having a major disorder and all that comes with that. The bad news for Jan – no one is going to give n. the resources he wants and that she thinks he deserves. But he showed Jan and n. he was prepared to take n’s side. The take-away for me – n. has a hard time listening to me.